Thoughts on Babies

This is just too damn funny...I can see them talking about buying and selling stocks or some shit. Weird baby speak...





-"Bebe"Kyle

Thoughts on Thunder and Lightning

So I was woken up this morning at around 7 by the whole house shaking. I have never in my life experienced such intense thunder and lightning as I saw today. It has been pouring rain the entire day with some of the most amazing looking lightning ever. According to my grandma Florida is known for having nuts lightning and it is a reputation well earned. I took advantage of this horrible weather by not getting out of bed until around 4 o'clock. My aunt's boyfriend hooked it up with a Florida Rain Storm Emergency Kit...a little black bag with an xbox 360 in it. Very much apprreciated.

To top of a wonderful day of doing absolutely nothing we all went out to El Tanempa for dinner. It was at dinner, half way through a delicious taco, that I diecided that I was going to marry a Spanish or Mexican girl. I am in love with their food, their culture and their dark hair. The Carne Asada tacos at that place were off the hook. All and all a wonderful and lazy day. Peace and Love

-Kyle Griffith McChesney

Asleep - Emily Browning (another Sucker Punch song)

Lazy, nothing interesting to write about... Listen to my girly music...

Thoughts on Mini-Golf and the Florida Otter

I saw an otter in the pond by my grandma's house today. I first thought it was an alligator, but upon further investigation I discovered it was an otter. It was the cutest thing I have seen in a long time. I stood right by the shore and watched him frolic in the water for a while. He would dive underwater and do cartwheels underwater for a while, then come up for air, and stare at me, while flashing his little white teeth. Cute as hell. I am continually surprised by the amount of wildlife encounters I have here in Florida. I found a show that sums all the Florida wildlife. It's called Swamp People, basically they go out and hook alligators on fishing lines, then shoot them in the head and sell them. Best part of it all is that Swamp People is on the History Channel. Got to love TV...
After seeing the otter we went to play mini golf at Congo River Mini golf. Every time I get the idea of mini golf in my head it goes something like this.
"Darn, I haven't played mini golf in a while"
"God, I really love mini golf'
"We need to go play mini golf"
"Yes, we are finally playing mini golf"
(put my ball in the ridiculous water trap 3 times on the first hole)
"God, I really hate mini golf
(lose to my mom by like 10 strokes)
"I am never playing mini golf again"

Theme of this post, I hate mini golf. It is the devil's sport

-Kyle Griffith McChesney

Thoughts on Rain

Today was an absolute tradegy. I was woken up by a loud clap of thunder and it has been pouring rain all day long. When you live in a place that is basicallly one big amusement park built atop a swamp, rain sort of ruins all activities. I sat around all day on youtube and various other internet distractions. I have taken three naps today, and had some pretty crazy dreams. Other then that I have nothing of excitement to write about, it's been a rainy monday...

Find more artists like shiny toy guns at Myspace Music

This is pretty fitting and it is also a great song.

-Kyle Griffith McChesney

Thoughts on the Beach and Cooking

Went to Cocoa Beach today. It was pretty darn wonderful. It is one thing chilling by the pool in nice Florida weather, and it is a completely different thing to actually be at the ocean. I am in love with the ocean, it is so relaxing to stand in the waves. At the same time, I will never swim more then like ten feet out, I am terrified of sharks. I am such a pansy about it, but there is something really scary about them.
Anyways, walking up and down the beach looking at all the crazy people sure is enjoyable. My mom, being a mother, was all "wear some sunscreen...you will get a sun burn...you'll shoot you eye out...blah blah blah" Now, normally i never ever ever wear sunscreen. I think it is stupid, I barely ever get sun-burned. I have always said when it comes to terrible diseases, cancer and the like "Oh, they will have that cured by the time I get it." All that aside I finally caved in today and wore sun screen. So I get home today and I have the most fucked up tan/burn/pale splotches. I have red, white and brown patches all over my stomach. If I had not covered my body in that gross mayonnaise looking goop I would have been burned red like a lobster. Tomorrow, I would have been all dark and handsome, thanks mom.

Anyways, we came home and made fajitas for my family, grandmother, aunts and uncles. I slayed it up in the kitchen. Made some delicious guacamole and then cut like four pounds of assorted vegetables. I felt pretty damn good about myself. I wonder if like in 15 years or whenever I am like looking for a serious girlfriend can I say I know how to cook. Then like three months into dating shes all like "So I thought you could cook, all you have made is tacos, burritos and nachos....what the hell?"

I love Mexican food

-Kyle Griffith McChesney

Thoughs on Being an Army Of Me

I feel pretty badass right now, playing Cribbage online again. I taught my parent but they only wanted to play twice. So now i am pawning newbs on Pogo while listening to the badass Sucker Punch soundtrack. I know that is all I am going to be talking about for awhile so get over it. The soundtrack is just so good, and it is great noob stomping music, or at least some of it is. The rest is sad emo songs, but still really good. I found out that another one of the actresses sings the covers of Where is my Mind and Sweet Dreams for the soundtrack. Which makes them all the more amazing. I just beat some person by like 45 points in cribbage, suddenly they said that they had to go...something tells me they did not really have to leave. It's hard being on the top I guess. Okay new victim has joined, poor them I guess.

So here is the reason I sound like such a cocky douchebag up there...


This on repeat makes you feel really badass. Not only does it sound badass but it tells you that you are an army, which is like the theme of the movie (as i mentioned). What I hate about amazing movies or TV shows is that they end and they are not real. Those two things really bother me, I want all this amazing shit to be real. It is not however, so enjoy your mundane reality while you watch hot girls fight dragons while flying B-17's over a castle. I am not paying attention to my game and now I am losing. Thanks blog.

Kyle Griffith McChesney

Thoughts on My New Favorite Movie

Today was an awesome day. I woke up at the crack of dawn, and went to the Arnold Palmer PGA tournament. I stood five feet from Tiger Woods and watched him play golf. Golf is quite possibly one of the most boring sports ever invented by human kind. It was interesting to watch for about thirty minutes. But I endured for Scooter's sake. After much time in the hot sun we left the tournament and went home. Relaxed by the pool for a few hours and took a nap. Then the day got awesome. After months of anticipation the day had arrived. Sucker Punch came out in theaters.

This movie was absolutely, mindblowingly amazing. It was such a complex movie, hours later my mind is still racing. On the surface it looks like a ridiculous, overly CGI action movie. But it was so much more. Zack Snyder is quite the genius. He skillfully paired an intense and unexplainable story line of darkness and alternate reality with so of the most intense, bizarre and original action sequences I have ever seen in my life. The idea that brought the whole movie together was that You have the power. You have all the weapons you need to survive and endure anything. You are strong no matter what you think. I can really relate to this idea, unfortunatley I can't transform my problems into reanimated, steam-powered WWI German soldiers and shoot the hell out of them. Never the less it was still an awesome movie.

The soundtrack was especially amazing. There was two great covers: Sweet Dreams Are Made of These and Where Is My Mind. The original scores were so perfectly fit to the movie that it added a whole new dimension to the movie. I saw one of the world's most famous athletes play today, and stood three feet from him. But I could care less. This movie was life changing.

On another awesome note, my favorite actress was it in. Jena Malone. She was in Donnie Darkko (favorite movie) and now in Sucker Punch (new favorite movie) and I now discover that she has a band, and she makes beautiful music. Here is a great one I found:

Find more artists like Jena Malone and her bloodstains at Myspace Music

It's been a wonderful day.

-Kyle McChesney

Karate Kyle and Being Lazy

I am being lazy today, I have no inspiration for a thoughtful post about anything. So I have a funny meme of Karate Kyle. I think this kid looks like a brown haired version of my dear friend Crispin. But he has my name so I guess that does not really work. I slept by the pool all day and am going to a PGA tournament tomorrow. Maybe I can do some gold-diggin with old Tiger. Gotta love Florida.
-Kyle Griffith McChesney

Kyle McChesney's Thoughts on Grandmas

So down here in Florida is where one of my Grandmother's lives. I am lucky enough to still have both my grandmothers, and I love both of them dearly. My New Jersey grandma is the kindest, sweetest lady who knits and bakes cookies. I love her with all my heart. My dad's mother, the Florida grandma is a little bit different. She left this morning to go to D.C. to visit my Grandpa at the Arlington National Cemetery (rest in peace grandpa). So after she left I found a note she left for me. The note was a list of "chores" for me to take care of while she was gone.

"Kyle:

1. Daily: Pogo-

do the 1xday games.

2.Wed: Do the weekly games. 

Usually 2 plus personal (CHOOSE Cribbage) "

This note probably takes some explaining before the true humor comes out. So Club: Pogo is an online gaming website. There are hundreds of games on it from card games to puzzle games and everything in between. It cost like 15 dollars a year or something to be a member and get all the benefits. You win tokens playing games and supposedly can use them in cash prize raffles. So every week Club: Pogo releases Badges, usually two or three. These weekly Badges are the exact same thing as achievements on XboxLive. It says for example: "Earn three Bingos in Safari Bingo Bash". You go, play Safari Bingo Bash and once you earn three bingos you get the badge and some tokens. New badges are released every Wednesday along with two personal badges. The personal badges allow you to go back into the yearly albums and complete any badges you might have missed. My chores from Florida grandma consist of doing the weekly badges, the personal badges for the 2006 album (Yah she has every one since 2006 completed) AND they added a new thing since last I was here which are daily bonus challenges to earn extra tokens. I have been playing Bingo, Majong and Cribbage all freaking morning, I think I deserve the "Best Grandson Ever" award. I was thinking about it, and if she played Xbox her gamerscore would be like 10 million. She is the worst achievement hunter I have ever met and I think its super awesome.

Getting to the pool for quite possibly the most important component of GTL.....the tanning.

-Kyle Griffith McChesney

Thoughts on Flying to Florida

Woohoo, awesome, horrible quality, cell-phone slide show of my journey to Florida. Ready...Go!

That is me, looking all snappy for the flight, have to represent the McChesney family well. Driving through New York, getting honked at for having Montana plates.

That's New York City (some part of it) as seen from the Verrazano Narrows Bridge. Great camera work going 70 miles per hour, if i don't say so myself.

Kind of a lame looking picture, but there is a story behind it. On the left are some Brooklyn Apartment buildings, where they filmed much of Requiem For a Dream. Never ever going to do drugs after that movie. The Ferris Wheel on the right is none other then the Coney Island Ferris Wheel....wwwaaarrriiiorrrsssss...cccomee ooutt too pllaaaaaaeeeyyy!  WARRRRIIIIOOORRRSSS. Such a great freaking movie.

That's what it looks like being me...At least when I look at my feet. Don't quite know why I took that one...

There is my wonderful father, Scott. From this moment on he will be called by his true name: Scooter. This is a wonderful picture of him being a jokster on the bus to the terminal at JFK.

There is my mom, Lorel, clearly very pleased with my dad's antics.....or maybe not.

There is the airplane I am going to get on too soon. If anyone has been to JFK they will know that it is kind of a dump. There are all these old remnants of airlines long since shut-down. They build new buildings around the old T.W.A. airlines terminal and just left it stuck in the middle of everything. It is a weird place. It is like a Frankenstein airport, old run down bits spliced together with new and futuristic parts. It is an interesting place.

There is the weather report for Orlando, Florida. It says 80 degrees and sunny as the forecast, which is freaking surprising. I lived in Florida for four months and not once was it 80 degrees and sunny. I can't keep that joke going, it is always sunny here and I love it. The snow in Montana was too much for me, and even that chilly Jersey wind was getting to me. I love nothing more then hot, humid weather, the cool pool ready to be swam in, and the friendly alligators waiting to greet me in the front yard.

Finally arrived, way better then last time traveling. Got on the first flight we tried for, and sat first class. God I love my dad's job. Thankfully, the flight was shorter then expected, and i was not forced to endure anymore Inception.

Thoughts on the Internet

Tonight, I was again stricken with soul crushing boredom. I set about to defeat my boredom using the only tool I had at my disposal, The Internet. Youtube, Netflix, Xbox Live, all perfectly good cures for teenage boredom but tonight I wanted something new. Chatroulette used to be an interesting option, but we all got tired of seeing creepy dudes masterbaiting on camera. I therefore made the choice to enter into the world of Omegle. The idea is exactly the same, however, the option exists to only have a text conversation. No video, therefore no penis, I great feature in my mind. As I began my quest I encountered a similar crowd as in Chatroulette, however their modus operoti (or how ever its spelled) was different. They ask "asl?" rudely, without even saying hello. When I responded 18 M NJ they would instantly disconnect. The scientist in me began an experiment, I would type 18, press enter, then pause type NJ, pause, then M. It was (as i suspected) the fact that I was a guy that caused them to disconnect.
I suppose trolling the chat site for girls is better then showing your junk to everyone, but it still bothered me. I simply wanted to have a nice conversation with someone, connect in whatever way the internet allowed, and have some faith restored in the people on the internet. We all know that the internet is filled with creepy "stranger danger" type people, but I am over joyed to say that tonight I met someone who was not. I had a lengthy conversation with a girl from Canada. We talked about a whole lot of topics ranging from music to the Trailer Park Boys. It was such a relief to find a normal, sane, non sex crazed person on the Omegle. It really restored my faith in Internet users and the Internet itself. She did not even think it was weird that I loved girl bands. In fact Tegan and Sara and this girl are from the same country. Canada seems like an awesome place, I met many a Canadian at Sasquatch and they all rocked. I might have to move there some day or at least have a home #4 or 5 there. I also found a meme tonight call karate kyle, its a nerdy looking kid in karate garb, and the captions usually relate to killing bullys who took his lunch money. I was never picked on, and I never had glasses. None the less I am pretty stoaked that there is a meme with my name.
Thanks a Bunch Internet

Breakfast with My Shadow

I woke up in a Lego bedroom
Sleeping in my burlap sack
And all the mosquitos know I love you
Can I love me just as much
And I had breakfast with my shadow
We had quite the discussion
Can you fall in love with the things you only know the things you may never touch?

My day at work was just like it always is
The same old same old
I appreciate the opportunity over and over
But I had supper with my shadow
And we had quite the discussion
If I truly believe that things can change will I wake up to something different?

Thoughts on Girl Musicians and Sleeping In

I freaking love girl musicians. I have no way to explain it, but something about the way Ke$ha sings a tune just captures my undying love. From crappy pop singers like Ke$ha and Gaga to obscure hipster singers like Polly Scattergood. Sometimes the rage of The Black Dahila Murders needs to be salved by Lights and her key-tar. I like to think that I listen to a very wide range of music, with everything from death metal to girly pop. I hate country music, girl country singers included. This is kind of a dead end.

I some how managed to stay up until like 4am last night, even after the hellish travel saga. Glad to be back in the New Jersey swing of things, no friends, no life. Just me and whatever wonders stumble upon has to offer. I have never been able to sleep in past like 10 in the morning until moving here. 2 in the afternoon is a wonderful time to wake up in my opinion. It also allows for my patent pending Breakfast/Lunch. There is nothing better then eating a huge bowl of captain crunch followed immediatley by left over pizza. Catching up on internet TV is wonderful also, I like to think that Netflix missed me so much that it added awesome new shows and movies for my return. Spartacus: Blood and Sand rocks my world, I suggest you all check it out.

These are both bands that I love. So don't call me a pussy.

Thoughts Being Bored and Making Fun of Band Kids

Thoughts On Dirty Jersey

I finally made it back home to Dirty Jersey. It kind of scares me that I missed it here but not having to steal internet from your neighbors really has its benefits. Xbox Live sure has missed me, and I have hours of youtube videos to watch. The flight from Salt Lake to Newark was pretty interesting. I took an Advil PM last night to fall asleep in the hotel room (on a count of my mom's horrendous snoring), it carried over to this morning and I was a zombie. This made the 3.5 hours flight a little better since I slept a lot. I woke up an hour before we landed and it was pretty funny. A whole bunch of people were standing up in the aisle chatting their asses off. Leave it to New Jerseyians to know a guy on a plane out of thousands of people flying on thousands of planes to thousands of destinations. This one friggin guy behind me was talking so loud about such unimportant stuff I almost turned around and yelled at him. At that point in time I knew that I was in New Jersey.


Other reasons I know I am back in Dirty Jersey:
-Have watched Youtube all night
-Dinner is pizza
-It is windy
-I feel the need to do everything very quickly and be rude to everyone
-Joey Broney...

But of course, already making travel plans to go to home #3 HELLebration, Florida. I guess its beach time for me.
Thanks for following me....Crispin

Thoughts on Flying

Being a non-revenue airline traveler, I find my self with quite the surplus of free time in airports. This trip from Bozeman, MT to Newark, NJ was no exception. I have been sitting in the Salt Lake City Airport since the dark hours of the morning and taking advantage of the wonderfully slow but free Wi-Fi. I have always had some adverse feelings towards blogging, but lucky for the few who read this, I have much stronger adverse feelings towards boredom. So that is why I now find myself writing a blog.

The topic...or main idea of this "post" is flying, mostly on Delta Airlines Jets. My dad is a pilot, he flew for Northwest Airlines for as long as a I can remember. I was raised on NWA, flew all the time as a kid and the one thing that has been constant through out it all was my inability to sleep on airplanes. I have no idea why but something about flying, me and sleep just does not compute. I can sleep if there is a delay on the ground but I will wake up right when we take off. Flying for free means taking any open seat, usually on the late night flights. A whirl wind of claustrophobia, sore back and boredom usually ensues. I am currently getting mentally prepared for the red-eye flight from Salt Lake to Newark. Leaves at 11:45 MST and lands at 6:45 EST, and it is almost completely full. Its ironic really, my family has had a strong desire to see planes full of people because of the economic trouble the airlines have been having. But it sure is not what I like to see when I actually fly on them.

Speaking of problems, NWA or Northwest Airlines (not the rappers), no longer exists. They merged with Delta. I was raised to hate Delta, but their first class policy has convinced me to feel much to the contrary. "Building a better airline, not just a bigger one." I guess I can believe that. Another problem with flying "non-rev" is spring break. I am just trying to get back to Home #1 (New Jersey) from Home #2 (Montana) but all the spring breakers won't have any part of such plans. I had so much time in the airport today that I left and met up with one of my conveniently located brothers who lives in Salt Lake. Ate Mexican food in a huge train station from back in the day. The "Rio Grande" makes a pretty good chicken taco and I; having some experience with Mexican cuisine, would recommend it.

I am really clueless as to how I am supposed to do this whole blogging thing, but I am intrigued by it.
-Kyle Griffith McChesney